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I Heart Safeway And Saving Money

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 ”I’m so excited, and I just can’t hide it.  I’m about to lose control and I think I like it.”  – Lyrics from I’m So Excited by the Pointer Sisters

Ladies hold on to yourselves because I have good news for you. is partnering with Northern California Safeways to help promote Safeway’s amazing new everyday low price program.   Not only will I be writing about great savings offered through Safeway, but the generous folks at Safeway will also be giving me several $50.00 gift cards to give away to my readers.  I’m more than just a little thrilled about the thought of working with Safeway, but also helping my readers learn of true savings and helping stretch the family budget, which we ALL need these days.  I feel like I just got into my pre-pregnancy jeans AND found a twenty dollar bill in the pocket.   Love it.

This is the first time on this site that I have ever agreed to be part of a promotion or giveaway.  I have been approached before and I always declined.  It just wasn’t for me.  What Safeway is doing through their price reduction program to help make groceries and staples for the family more affordable is amazing.  I wanted to be a part of the process, spreading the word about Safeway’s every day price reduction program.

Recently I was in a Bay Area Safeway that was GORGEOUS!  It even had a huge wine room!    For those of you who have spent eight long hot hours in the sun for the weekend swim meet only to watch your precious pumpkin swim a total of 30 seconds, a wine room visit to Safeway is much deserved.  My local Safeway has also remodeled and again, well done. The stores look warm and inviting and well put together. I thought to myself , “Wow, Safeway is getting fancy and going uptown.”   With Safeway’s new every day low price program you don’t have to pay uptown prices! 

In fact, when I went in to Safeway to check out the YELLOW TAGS marking the items reduced, the quality of the products was so impressive I got excited and almost blew my Spanx shaper right off!  The items offered for additional savings are staples of households from cereal to yogurts and cheese, combined with Safeway’s already low Club prices, creates and opportunity to save even more money.

Safeway is also partnering with local Northern California radio stations for a fantastic $1000 Safeway Giveaway. Below are more details on the $1000 giveaway:

  • Safeway shoppers can pick up their “I Play Tag and Save at Safeway” car decal at their local Safeway store starting on Wednesday, July 29th (at checkout or customer service)
  • Customers will be directed to display the decal on their cars’ back window
  • Customers will be directed to listen to their local radio station (we have 5 stations participating in different markets) for details on getting “Spotted” with the decal and the chance to win a $1000 Safeway Gift Card
  • 28 winners will be selected throughout 5 different areas (San Francisco, San Jose, Sacramento, East Bay and Reno) between August 1st and August 8th

OK, enough blogging, time to go give Safeway a look.  Look for the YELLOW TAGS. I promise you will save money and be impressed with their friendly customer service.  Keep checking back with for my posts about my shopping experience at Safeway and the chance to win a Safeway $50.00 gift card. I would also love to hear about your shopping experience.

Now go and save you some money at Safeway girl! 

*I received a Safeway gift card for this post, however the views and opinions expressed here are my own.  Safeway has also provided the $50.00 gift card to be given away to readers.

How to Make Swiss Muesli


Muesli is a traditional Swiss breakfast staple.   Healthy, delicious, and inexpensive Muesli will be a treat for the whole family.  Ettore grew up on Muesli in Switzerland and often had Muesli for breakfast, but also lunch and dinner.  To the delight of his customers, Ettore now serves Muesli in his bakery Ettore’s. Add a little honey or whipped cream for a touch of sweetness or as a light dessert. Watch the video above and enjoy the recipe for Muesli listed below.

Happy Eating!


  • 1 cup quick oats  NOTE: make sure you use quick oats to absorb the milk
  • 1 cup lowfat milk
  • 1 cup plain yogurt
  • 1 small container flavored yogurt.   Example: raspberry, strawberry, blueberry
  • 1 whole green apple
  • 1-1 1/2 cups total seasonal fruit.  Use one or combination of  raspberries, blueberries, blackberries, strawberries, grapes  NOTE: no citrus fruits

In a large bowl mix together with a spatula or serving spoon quick oats, milk, plain and flavored yogurt. Grate whole green apple with skin and add to the mix. Stir in fresh fruit.  Serve immediately.  Store remainder in bowl and cover with plastic wrap.

Serves 6

Total cost: approximately $5.00

Happy 16th Birthday Harrison

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June 2009


June 2006



 Dear Harrison,

Happy 16th Birthday!!  I can’t believe the little boy who I used to carry around on my shoulders just drove me to Target.  I have thought long and hard (and of course cried) thinking of what to say on such an important milestone in one’s life, and to such an important person in my life.  

There are the obvious life philosophies and teachings, which I tell you all the time.   Don’t drive crazy, act crazy, or talk crazy.  Don’t do drugs and don’t drop out of school.  Don’t wash whites with colors and don’t lie to your stepmother.

Do show and practice kindness to others.  Do give back to others in gratitude for what you have been given.  Do laugh, enjoy life, and try new things keeping in mind that life is a continual journey of education and growth.  Finally, do always remember to call your stepmother.

Those are the life philospohies to keep in mind as you grow from teenager to young man.  As I sit at my computer thinking and looking around the condo at the life and family we have all built together, I know that on your 16th birthday I also want to say thank you.  When I first started dating your Dad all those years ago I was so scared that you would resent me for stepping into your life and that I would be viewed as the “evil Stepmother.”  In a million years I would never want to do that to you.  Your Dad assured me that you were a wonderful and accepting kid and that we would get along just fine….and you know what, your Dad was right.  You were a great kid, and now you are growing into a great young man.

So THANK YOU Harrison for never making me feel “step” anything, for treating me with love and respect, for welcoming me into your family, and for all the great memories and laughter we have shared.

Happy 16th Birthday!  GO GET ‘EM!

Love Your Proud Stepmom,


Dear Jesus,

THANK YOU  for Barney videos…and Zoloft.


The Best Ever

Mommy and LucasLucas goes to a wonderful daycare a few days a week.  He loves it and I love six hours in a row of only having to wipe one butt in this household.  I was talking to another Mother outside the daycare who’s son Parker also attends a few days a week.  This Mother gave me her business card, and I noticed she was a lawyer.

Me:  “Oh, wow you are a lawyer?”

Lawyer Mom:  “Yeah, sure.  No big deal these days.”

Me:  “Do you not like being a lawyer?”

Lawyer  Mom:  “Oh no, it’s fine.  It just doesn’t mean the same to me anymore.”

Me:  “What do you mean?”

Lawyer Mom:  “More than the title of lawyer I like the title of Parker’s Mom.  I love to hear the kids call me Parker’s Mom.  Like when they call out Parker’s Mom is here…It’s the BEST title in the world.”

Now I love a good title and there are some FANTASTIC ones out there I would wear without shame…Supermodel, Super Lotto Winner, Mrs. Clooney…but all pale in comparsion to the title I actually have and one I would never give up or trade for anything in the world.  .

Lucas’ Mom.

Parker’s Mom was absolutely right.

The Vagina Chronicles Explained

Vagina vagina vagina.   It needs to be said.   My vagina is the thing that got this whole process started for me, including this website.   My vagina was amazing in delivering my son, but she and I took a royal ass whipping in the process and we are ready to tell the story.  I originally posted these vagina entries long ago and then took them down, but I am ready to share my story again.   The three entries are in chronological order from deliver (Your Vagina Is Healing Kind of Funny), to the vagina surgery to repair the birth stitch line (Time To Carve The Thanksgiving Vagina), to finally the dramatic and painful road to vagina surgery recovery (As The Vagina Turns).  Read ahead, you’ll laugh…you’ll cry…you’ll cross you legs….I did all three…often at the same time.

Hold on to your panties ladies, it was a wild ride!

“Your Vagina is Healing Kinda Funny”

Music to my ears.  What girl wouldn’t want to hear that about her vagina, that it’s healing “kinda funny”.  This is what my Ob/Gyn says to me on my post birth visit about three months after my son’s  delivery. 

Funny good.

Vagina healing funny…NOT SO GOOD.

A little back story is a must.  My son Lucas was 9lbs. 11 0z upon arrival.  He was a BIG healthy boy…and I got him out in five pushes.  After two pushes I had a three minute contraction and his heart rate went down and didn’t come back up.  The nurse ran out of the room and yelled CODE.  Suddenly the birthing room was FULL of doctors and nurses…

All of them looking like the cast of doctors from Grey’s Anatomy. 

I kid you not, the doctors and nurses were all georgeous.  Side bar, the female doctors and nurses at Kaiser Morse in Sacramento got it going on, they looked like they took a break from shooting at Seattle Grace Hospital to deliver my baby.  Out of nowhere,  Dr. Meredith Grey’s look-a-like was staring at me between my legs.  After a brief second of, “gosh they all look like Dr.s from Grey’s Anatomy,” we got back to saving my baby’s life.  “Dr. Grey” told me I had three pushes to get Lucas out or it was an emergency C-section. 

I think I went to the other mental place that Mothers go when you hear your baby is in trouble.  I felt the room go still, it was like there was no one there, and it was suddenly completely quiet as I pushed my baby out in exactly three pushes!  YEAH!   Three pushes and a lot of tearing later, my son Lucas was born. He didn’t even stop for his shoulders.  I went from crowning to crying in three pushes flat.  My vagina was amazing, a hero, a warrior and she had the battle scars to prove her courage on the battlefied. 

So after my son was safe and ten fingers and toes had been counted, I watched as Dr. Grey tugged and sewed me up.  It was killing me, not the sewing (thank you epidural) the fact that they all looked like television stars.  I had to say something….

Me:  (While looking between my legs), “Is Mc Dreamy” on rounds today?”

Dr. Grey:  “Excuse me?”

Me:  “This is cheesy, and maybe not the most appropriate time to bring this up, but you know you all look like you belong on Grey’s Anatomy.”

Dr. Grey:  (Sigh) “Yeah, we get that sometimes.”

Me:  “It’s kinda cool…..Dr. Grey?”

Dr. Grey:  “Yeah.”

Me:  “Can I ask you something?  Before you were saving lives at Seattle Grace,  did you study Home Economics?”

Dr.Grey:  (Playing along), “Um, why?”

Me:  “Because I am watching you sew up my vagina, and I hope you’ve at least made a pillow or shirt before this.”  

Dr. Grey:  (Lauging out loud), “Yes, I have done this before, but we might need to do some repair work after you heal.”

That is how the whole vagina chronicles got started.  The story of how my vagina had to be repaired and how my vagina ”healed funny”.

Time To Carve The Thanksgiving Vagina

I know, I know, a lot of vagina talk right off the bat, but it has been a big part of my goings on as of late.  Most of the time I am happy when we (my vagina and I) are in a silent state of bliss.  Sort of a zen silence is golden understanding…I make sure nothings leaking, creaking, or cracking down there and my vagina leaves me alone (i.e. no protesting with a yeast infection).   I make sure I don’t go filling her up with scented tampons or God forbid a douche (shudder).   I also make sure she is not a hotel with different visitors every night, leaving their STD luggage behind.  My husband is the only guest checking in, and I had his bags screened at the airport before he ever boarded my plane.  So you can see that I felt horribly guilty offering up my vagina to the chopping block to get all my stitches repaired from my son’s birth.  She did such a good job of getting him out, that my vagina didn’t see it coming. 

I lied to my vagina.  I told her it wouldn’t hurt…it did!

I told her it would be over quick…it took an hour!

I told her there would be only one shot, there were SIX bulleyes right between my legs!

This all went down the week before Thanksgiving.  I teased my OB/GYN that he was getting practice for carving the Thanksgiving turkey.  He dryly replied, “turkeys aren’t vaginas.”  I am such a sicko, with my legs in the air getting ready to be carved up my mind started to wander.  Do turkeys even have vaginas?  If a vagina WAS a turkey, what would you serve it with?  Ha ha. (Now I am amusing myself).  Wouldn’t you stuff the turkey vagina with penis stuffing?  (Now I am actually laughing).  All this turkey vagina  talk was doing a wonderful job of distracting me until that first needle pierced that first layer of oh so sensitive skin.  All of the sudden there was NO FUCKING WAY A TURKEY WAS A VAGINA BECAUSE IT WAS MY VAGINA AND I AM NOT A TURKEY AND IT FUCKING HURT!

I thought, my son had better never do drugs, never jaywalk, never speed in his car, never get a bad grade, never be mean to me.  I have earned points in his good behavior bank the hard way.  Of course that is only “slightly” unrealistic, but as my legs started trembling and the shots started going in and my doctor looked for his glasses (that were on his nose) I felt I had earned points in the bank of YOUR CHILDREN ARE ALWAYS WELL BEHAVED…opening a branch near you.  Listen, it is late lovies, I will write more later.  Vagina drama to be continued.

As the Vagina Turns…

My vagina has more drama than the afternoon soap operas.  Lots of you have asked how my vagina is doing.  After my vagina surgery and subsequent horrible recovery there seems to be an enormous interest in what’s going on “down there.”  My friend Monica’s husband even asked for a “Toolee” update when I went underground for a few days.  I wish there was as much interest in my vagina when I was in my 20′s, back then I couldn’t buy an inquiry.  It’s the truth, it was so bad that when I was approaching thirty my Mother asked, very tenderly, if I was a lesbian.  She also went on to include that she would unconditionally accept me and my “friends.”  It was all very sweet, but I had to disappoint her and tell her I wasn’t gay, neither men nor women were interested in dating me. I was just a single woman, approaching thirty.   I think my Mom was just trying to double her odds of getting a grandchild out of me.  It didn’t matter, she wanted me married and pregnant.  If a tree could of married me and got me pregnant she would of asked if I liked bark, and accepted us both, splinters and all.   

Just the opposite is true now, seems everyone wants a peek at the action.  Especially if you are a doctor, wear a white coat, and work at Kaiser.  You see after my vaginal surgery to repair the stitch line and tearing due to my son’s birth, something went VERY awry.  I was not healing normally.  I was bruised, had intense itching, constant throbbing, and an entire week after the procedure my vagina was still so swollen it looked like I was baking bread in my underwear.   I couldn’t sleep, pick up Lucas, or sit.  Wooden chairs were an ENEMY.

I became a frequent “spreader and scoot on downer” at Kaiser.  The doctors tried everything: vicodin, codeine, numbing cream so I could pee, antibiotics, steroid foam, yeast infection treatments, ice packs, nothing worked.  They could not figure out why I was in agony and not healing properly.  I was in so much pain, I even went to the ER on a SUNDAY.  This is where a Dr. Dakota (sounds pornish) complimented me on my smile before he examined my vagina.  I thought to myself,  “Dr. Dakota, you naive man.  You spoke too soon…just wait till you see my OTHER pair of lips.”  Turns out Dr. Dakota thought it might be a fistula.  Curious what a fistula is?  Me too…and I asked. 

Me:  “What’s a fistula, sounds terrible.”

Dr. Dakota:  “Basically it is a hole between your rectal and vaginal wall.”

Me:  (Already getting suspicious of where this was going). ”How do you check for a fistula?”

Dr. Dakota:  ”basically…..”

Me: “basically…..what???”

Dr. Dakota:  “basically I put my finger up your butt and press against your vaginal and rectal wall, AND if your vagina poops poop you have a fistula.”

Me: (sigh) “Let me guess….scoot on down.”

So that is exactly what I did.  I scooted and he inserted.  One gloved finger pressed aganist my vaginal and rectal wall later…no leaky faucet.  My vagina, in fact, did NOT poop poop.  No big surprise, no fistula, and still no correct diagnosis.  He told me to see my OB/GYN in the morning.  I felt cheap.  This guy basically hits on me and then five minutes later shoves his finger up my butt and not so much as a cocktail first.  In some countries we would be married.  My sore vagina and now my sore ass beat a quick retreat from Kaiser, no better than we entered.

It wasn’t until the next day that I found salvation in the form of a kind little doctor whom I had never met before.  I began to think I was having an allergic reaction to the stitches.  I mentioned that to the doctor and that sweet angel of a woman agreed and she very carefully took my stitches out!!!!!  Within 15 minutes I was feeling so much better, and an hour later it was as if Jesus (or Oprah) performed a miracle and healed me on the spot.  Release the doves, I thought.  Sound the trumpets, alert the media, I WAS HEALED!!!!   I thought at any moment I was going to start talking in tongue, that is how quickly I felt better and how relieved I was.

An update to today.  ALL the stitches are now out.  I had to go back and have one more taken out that had surfaced.   I am still a little sore, but I can sit without wincing and seem to be on the mend.  Thank you all for your support and kind words.  “Kitty” and I both appreciate it.

Baby’s Got A Brand New Bag

Lucas Bag 1 Lucas Bag 3

They say there is nothing like a boy and his dog bag.  Lucas working his new pink purse, which he takes very seriously.  Now if only his shoes matched.

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